Do you know why you have the goal that you do?? The reason for this goal is either contributing to your success or the reason for your complete utter failure. Let me use myself as an example.
After having my daughter I was at the heaviest that I have ever been in my whole life. I knew from my first pregnancy that I was not one of those people that lost weight with breastfeeding. I was shocked and disappointed the first time around when I held on to extra weight until I finally stopped breastfeeding. I felt lied to…. Every website and person around me told me that breastfeeding was the secret to postpartum weight loss. I felt like an outlier and failure because it didn't work that way for me. What I didn't expect was to gain weight after having my daughter. About a month in I was inching closer and closer to my full-term pregnancy weight. I was panicked, frustrated and scared all at the same time.
I wasn't going for supermodel postpartum standards I was just hoping that over time that I would trend back towards my previous set point.
Why was this important to me? Trending back to my normal set point had as much to do with not having to buy new clothes as it did my self-esteem and therefore my self-confidence. Living at my normal set point allowed me to feel like myself in a world that suddenly changed. I went from one to two kids, a big move and a change in lifestyle. I went from a full-time nurse to a once in a while nurse.
I knew that feeling like myself would give me the new confidence to tackle my new role and juggle two small children. I craved this feeling like the desert craves the rain ;). I desperately struggled to make progress on my own so I hired a coach to help. Best decision I could have made. I have learned so much and found a new passion in nutrition. I digress yet again. I blame the Jersey Italian in me.
Hiring a coach helped me to lose weight that I previously was unable to lose by myself. I learned that the plan that I was trying to use to lose weight was actually sabotaging my progress. Regardless, the best laid plan and coaching mean nothing if you can’t consistently stick with the plan. All plans require changes and all changes require sacrifice. It is your “why” that determines if the sacrifice is worthwhile or not. For me this yearn to feel like myself was unwavering and all the motivation I needed to stick with any plan laid before me. I hardly ever deviated from the plan. What I got was the results I wanted and feeling like myself in my skin. In fact, I did myself one better and ended up with a new found self-confidence that I had never previously experienced.
Fast forward to about three months ago. I decided to pursue an endeavor of aesthetics aka….looking better in my bikini. Here is the thing, it was a wishy washy goal at best. I am happy with how I look right now. I have been vocal about the fact that it is not my current goal to achieve a six-pack. It still isn't my current goal. Yes, it would be nice if it magically happened but I didn't care to really work for it. I chose the goal because that is what I thought I should be working on to impress someone else. Guess what…...I stuck to the plan sort of. I stayed within the numbers but my food quality dropped. I think this was a subconscious way for me to rebel. I wasn't living my true values or priorities. Prior to this endeavor my plate was filled with whole foods and veggies. The day that I changed the plan I started feeling restricted and craving foods that I had not desired in months. Do you know what kind of results I got? Minimal at best.
In truth my current goals do not reside in aesthetics. After losing the weight I gained with my pregnancy and fitting into my clothes, I feel content. . I am happy with how I look. My goals reside in performance. I dream of a 200 lb clean and jerk, not six pack abs. A diet that gets me closer to this goal is one that I would have been more willing to stick with because it is moving me towards my true goals at this time.
If you are having trouble sticking to your plan you have to ask yourself “why” you have the goals that you have anyway. Is it because you “think” you should fit into a certain size clothes? Do you compare yourself to Susie down the street and think because you don’t look like Susie that you are less than? Do you think that if you were a certain size that your life would be better in some way or that your current problems would disappear? Or are your goals motivated by what you want at your core?
Goals of convenience will never get you to where you want to go. You will find every reason to deviate. Goals that come from your core are the goals that will get you results.
So again, I ask you what are your goals and why?
Need help figuring out your goals and a plan? Email me at Theresa.Worley@icloud.com